Sugar-Coated Truth & Frosted Cranberries- Truth & Love Part 1

Let’s be honest — society has gotten to a point where we really don’t like difficult conversations. Are we more focused on “not hurting feelings” and catering to people that we have forgotten how to have honest, meaningful discussions? Have we become so fearful of one another’s judgment or so afraid of offending someone that we would rather stay silent on things that call for a voice and for action? We have built a culture in which so many things need to be sugar-coated, wrapped in fluff, and delivered with the softest of touches in order for it to be received. Before you jump to any conclusions about my point here, let’s acknowledge that empathy, compassion and love are NECESSITIES when speaking truth. But have we lost sight of the fact that sometimes the best thing for us is for the truth to be brought forth — even if it’s uncomfortable?

As Christians, we are called to speak the truth — no matter how uncomfortable or unpopular that truth may be. That doesn’t just mean speaking up about truth in secular society — this also means holding one another accountable with the body of Christ. We live in a world that preaches comfort, acceptance, tolerance and political correctness over honesty and objective truth. As believers, this can leave us in a tricky spot. Should we speak up or take a more soft approach? If it is going to offend others, should we just avoid it?

I think the better questions are: Does my silence about the truth offend my God? Am I truly burdened for others who do not know the truth? How do we balance speaking truth with the call to love our neighbors well?

The reality is that, as Christians, our fear of the Lord and our love for Him must be greater than our fear of man or fear of offending. We are not called to avoid offense at all costs nor purposefully seek to offend out of our need to be right. Rather, we are to speak the truth in love, trusting that God’s Word is always the best way to navigate difficult topics. Truth and love are not mutually exclusive; they are two sides of the same coin.

At some point, as a Christian, you get to this place in life where you have to decide: Are you okay with unintentionally offending people with truth, if it means you’re not offending your God with lies? I used to stay silent about so many things but I just cannot do it any longer. There are too many hurting people and too many lies in this world to not stand up for change and truth. I don’t believe every battle is mine to fight and not every issue is mine to speak up about… But I have realized that there are some things God will burn in your heart to be bold about. There are some things you will have a righteous anger about coupled with a burdening love to see people be free and whole in Jesus. You have a deep seated need to be a part of the Lord establishing his Kingdom as a reality in the earth. We should not seek to be “right” just to be right. We should always show love and seek the Lord for wisdom. But we must understand that our love and fear of the Lord and the burden for people’s souls to know Jesus should burn hotter in our hearts than our fear of offending others.

From a Biblical standpoint, truth is crucial. Real love sometimes means speaking hard truths, even when it might sting. The Bible doesn’t sugar-coat life; it challenges us to grow, to be refined, and to embrace the sometimes-challenging process of becoming more like Christ. In today’s world, we tiptoe around difficult topics, avoid confrontation, and sometimes pretend to agree with things we don’t really believe. Or we DO believe in things we that are contrary to what God teaches us through his word or contrary to basic logic. This kind of communication and thinking do not help us grow. It keeps things shallow and prevents us from acknowledging objective truth and seeing logical reality.

Truth is Not About Being Mean—It should be about love.

Let’s get one thing straight: being truthful doesn't mean being harsh or cruel. God calls us to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15), especially when we are addressing matters that deal with our own brothers and sisters in Christ. There’s a big difference between being blunt and being hurtful. As Christians, we are commanded to show kindness, patience, and grace in our conversations. But those things don't mean we should hide the truth or avoid the hard topics. They mean we should approach each conversation with empathy, understanding, and a desire for people to be free, saved, whole and healed — and for God’s name be glorified.

I have realized that truth will always be offensive to the ego.

Pride doesn't like to be told it’s prideful and sin doesn’t like to be told it’s sinful. Real truth and love refuse to leave us in our mess, even when it’s uncomfortable to hear. Having empathy and compassion for one another are also crucial. But having these things does not mean abstaining from truth.

Disagreement doesn’t immediately equate to hate. We should be able to disagree and still be kind to one another.

Discomfort isn’t the enemy and truth can (and will) be offensive. Let’s just accept these realities. I would argue that maybe sometimes these are necessary… They are often the very things that spark growth and change. We should invite truth in to offend our pride.

Woah. I know. Maybe that’s controversial? Again, this is just where I am at personally. I want the truth to offend my pride and my sin. I’m okay with feeling that for a moment if it means I will be humbled enough to allow the Lord to change me. I cannot stay in that place of offense, but I’m okay with feeling that pinprick for a moment so that I can become more like my Savior.

Paul is clear that truth and love are not opposites but are meant to work together. Our love for others should be what compels us to speak the truth, and our commitment to truth should be what shapes how we love. It’s not one or the other—it’s both, in harmony. The very gospel itself is the perfect example of this: a message of love wrapped in truth—the truth that we are sinners in need of a Savior, and that Jesus, out of love, came to die for us so that we might be saved.

So where are you at in your life, Christian? What will you do with your time here? I, for one, refuse to continue to fall prey to the trap of sugar-coated conversations and the fear of truth or of offending. I refuse to have my compassion and empathy manipulated into a place of silence. I will not offend my God with accepting lies.

Be loving, be gracious, be kind, be compassionate… but do not abstain from the truth.

Stay tuned for Part 2 next week!

To accompany this tough topic, I’ve made a sweet-yet-tarte recipe for you! Try these Frosted Cranberries and let me know what you think! They’re the perfect festive food item for this Christmas season! Recipe card below.